Life After Graduation

If all goes well, then I will be graduating end of the year. What would be the next step? I dunno.. But no matter how much I try and convince myself to do well and etc. How some people tell me that they c me working in large companies and things like that but really...

I have no idea how I'm even gonna work. These 3 years of studying mostly programming and so on.. Until now, my programming is still sucky and weak. I've tried on designing websites and programming an app.. After awhile it either dies off... Or look superly basic and noobish. Urgh..... What am i gonna do..

And as any child in the family, we just wanna show our parents that we are doing our best. That life for us is gonna be a breeze.. ishifdsuhfdksbuysdbfjhdsgdshgudsyfgydsugfuysdg... This is all I can say. Aih aih aih~!

After that another question still stands.. Will my future be in Aussie? Or Malaysia? Furthermore... How bout him?... Still being human, how I wish I could c God's plans for me.


ReiRei

Although its not often that I come here and type anymore but at times like this when I really have no clue, it serves as a wonderful place for me to let everything out.

Is this the right step? Am I making the right decision? Why I can still question this?.... I can only say cause he is sooo different from the rest of the guys I've dated. And... I dunno. If I knew he was still in one even though he said its not gonna work out anymore, and still I saw all the happy pictures and dates, would I have still accepted him?

My heart is just heavy... Thinking.. Is it just his job to put me at ease? Or shud I play a part in making myself feel at ease too? Although he would compare with the other guys I've dated... And we agreed on not talking bout our exs/ex-admirers... Is it easy to let go of someone's past of ex-admirers than it is to let go of someone's past of exs? Or is it the same? I am happy with the future and present... But.... Just so so depressed and haunted with the past. And sometimes when I tot I'm thinking too much. Someone will tell me I'm not cause they feel anger on my behalf just hearing it. Yet... How can I say they are rite? Could they b angry cz they see me frustrated? Or r they genuinely angry coz it should be angry? He doesnt really seem to c it of something to b angry of, and his frens could b saying he is right.

If we wanna say wat does the heart say? Its still in the end based on feelings for this isnt it?

Although I dun wanna admit that it will be hard to get over and get on with life. Probably even harder for me to find another bf than he find a gf IF we happen to break... Bt I just dun wanna think bout it... Cz somehw almost everyone around me seem to think of it.. Hw can u face someone u shared a part of ur life with, while ur current partner is at ur side? I just dun get how people does it... Can u really bury all the painful and happy memories?

Its kinda sad cz if they say yes it will b easy to bury all the exs memories.. But when u bcome one of them... Haha... U will b part of the burying too..


ReiRei

Is Love Really Blind?

Probably a stupid thing to think now but sometimes with everyone asking me consistently and for the close friends who know the story, I myself cant answer why I accepted.

Some tell me I'm a fool for still believing or continuing the relationship. Some tells me they have no idea how I could still accept him for the things he's done. Unfortunate I guess for guys that it sometimes/most times seem like the girl is right.

Then not only that, both of us being from two different worlds or beliefs. Do you think this won't be a challenge? And why does he/i want to make his life so painful as my life has so much more restrictions compared to his?..

Being a Christian and he a pre-believer, its not easy or common to find a couple like this and happy yet the Christian is steady in his/her walk of faith. I want to share and ask how to approach this. Asking God on an answer for this is so hard as it seems like everyone has a feeling in this.. And how would I know if what they share is really from God and nt their feelings? The oni answer so far I can come up for that is time.


ReiRei

A Proper Kitchen

Somehow I really really miss my kitchen at home. REAL Home! EACH and Everytime I feel like I wanna experiment or do something special or don't just do a simple dish, I look around and see that there will be one or 2 equipment I don't have. And mostly? Its an oven. Aih..

How I miss making my cupcakes. I don't have the muffin tray here, n oven made it look like cakes.

How I miss baking and making desserts. I don't have pots and pans of different sizes. I don't have a rolling pin or food weigher.

How I miss making juices/smoothies/shakes. I don't have a blender.

How I miss making roasted food. I don't have a proper oven.

I would go on but its time to sleep. Oh how I miss these things. And looking through recipes make me feel all the more.. limited. Aih... Wat to do wat to do?

ReiRei

I Want An Oven!!!

Blah blah blah~ So things recently has been going quite upsie downsie. Then again, should have expected things to be like that especially with our different views and so on. But overcoming it makes it seem/feel like we've grown closer, or theres more problems ahead. But enough of that for now..

I WANT AN OVEN!!! How long does it take to roast 4 simple small potatoes??? 30min max?? Right? Right? Ugh!! And just when I thought this microwave oven is doing ok as a temporary/fan-forced oven... It totally ruined my brunch!! A meal which should take less than an hour to prepare, by right 30mins. Guess how long it took me just to get the potatoes ready? Just the potatoes..

Almost 2 HOURS!!! Then had to wait for chicken (2 and a half chicken breast) for another 45min. How ridiculous can that be????!!!! And you know how putting honey to get a golden crisp at the top of the chicken? Well this turned out slight yellow and that was it!! *hands showing "unbelievable"*

Ugh... No mood to roast anything in there anymore. I mean its great and faster that mom got me a pressure cooker. But I realized.. Its a lot more to wash and harder too! Considering that Aussie's basins are terribly/sadly SMALL. Normally you could wash  a pot without having to bump into the tap, but here is like u must carefully turn the pot to wash as to not bump into the tap. Aih...

ReiRei

Can I still hold my subtitle high? Even with the way I am?

Emotional, I am.

Through hurts I gave in.

I let myself get stepped on.

"Its not worth it" I told myself.

I drank myself drunk in tears.

Lord I know I gone far.

Lord I know I led myself astray.

To the curiosity I fell into.

To the words of man, I wanted to trust.

And though I told myself,

never again will I only look to You when I'm down.

But still right now,

After all these years,

I still cause you pain.

I still let you down.

Can I still say I'm sorry?

ReiRei

The Truth

Not knowing the truth, how wonderful life could be. Only to find that it was all but a dream.
I believe in your words, trust that you are not like them.
But looks like by accident I stumbled onto something I wished I never read.

Its always like this but this time through arguments. My heart cries out not wanting to believe in them.
I really don't wanna regret this. I really don't want it any lower than this..

Its not me.. Your heart breaks for her, your heart remembers her.. Its not me..
You been searching for her, through girls that are like her.. But they aren't her, are they..
I'm not her, am i.. Ask Suki? Ask your friends? How many more of your stories can I believe?

You were hurt when you saw? You were down in the pits when she broke your heart.
You tore everything in your path to show of your anger and frustration. And me?
I was just a small tiny part during that life, which boiled you but not enough..

Hah... Googie googie? What sweet love you still give, the attention you still pass...
Even when theres a "I miss you"...

Relationship what not.. To try here and there, why not?
As long as at the end of the day you get what you want, is that not?.......

Rach...

P.s
I should stop listening to the Phantom of the Opera =/

I'm Going Home

Yes I am going home but not permanently. Soon I can c everyone again! Somehow miss them more than I ever did. Will things be different? Will things work out? I have no idea. But what I wanna c is my sis getting back to her old self again. Its not right having a downcast sis. Sadly.. Yes sadly I miss her sudden anger, her "I can do it but u cant", her attitude and spunky-ness. Am learning some new dishes and treats. When I get back will make it for you guys!! C u c u c u soooon!! <3 Rei

Regrets? I hope not...

Shud have expect that the longer you are in a relationship, the tougher it gets of having someone else in your life. And somehw, blogging still makes me feel less tense of typing everything here. Arguments over small and big things also got. More frustrating is when each argument you have, one side feels this way is normal but to the other side it doesn't make sense. And no I am not talking about religion and morality. Although that prob could be applied but sometimes its frustrating when the simple reason he gives is "Thats the way I was brought up". Okay.. But I don't think that shud be the reason I have to accommodate to your needs is it? And you don't hear me say "Thats the way I was brought up". I mean come on, not everything should be done your way correct or not? Ugh.. N I KNEW that just coz I decided not to hang out with you while waiting for 2 hours just doing my work. U go get moody. Seriously?? Beginning it felt like if we do our own stuff it will b no problem. Recently its like if can do together, try to do everything together. And no I don't complain that we spend time together. But I complain that if either of us can't make it, DON'T SULK OR BE MOODY!! Goodness!! Its times like that or some random "don't-wanna-talk-anymore" mood that make me feel you would have prefer C. And when I think of that... UGH! The regrets which I don't wanna feel comes crawling in. And its those times I feel like screaming or shouting, what kind of promise are you keeping?? If you can think that thr is a problem with our relationship, if you think that sometimes you are the cause. Then for goodness try and change those parts which make me upset! Stop repeating them. Or at least do it in a way where both of us can accept. Don't use "Thats the way I been brought up" as an excuse coz the relationship will nid 2 ppl to mold and not one. If God wanna intervene then so be it. I guess sometimes there are things where we need someone who knows us more than we know each other to work things out. Rei

Stupid.. Plain idiotic-ly stupid.. Argh!! No idea why I'm so upset. Mad? Maybe mixture of sad and frustration? I seriously dunno. Screw it.. Got too many assignments to think about it anyway.

One thing I hate most is wishing me good things bitterly. Maybe I read it wrongly or what but.. If u wanna ask whats wrong, you dun go demanding wats wrong. Like.. Who the hell are you to tell me how to do?

Geez.. Attitude? Goodness.. Maybe been comfortable for too long. You don't understand, and you go demanding. My attitude? Check your own tone. Argh!!

我痛你都看不到。还敢讲我发脾气。。我本来不生气！！讲到这样我现在就火大！！开心了没？！！如果我现在觉得我们没希望的话，我现在就不管如果分手咯！ish... 真是气死我！！

ReiRei

Soo many things been happening!! Well, more like been just enjoying myself and hanging out with different groups of people.

Who knew things would turn out this way? Anyhow, had a wonderful bbq session as welcome to new members of ocf as well as to the old members returning from holidays. Studies have started and uni.. Is like.. Easy yet once start no idea. Not sure if its really dunno or just that I'm lacking behind.

Hm.. Maths is like.. mostly self learn I guess. The lecturer is not really teaching and online tests after online tests keeps coming in. What should I do???

Other than that, received many assignments d. So means no more playing time for the next 11 weeks. Saddddd....

As for sister, hope you are doing well and fine~!! I know jie isn't able to be back with u to kacau and take care of you but I'm sure God will watch over you better!! Trust and believe in your recovery so I shall do my best to do well here!!

Part of me feels bit different. Like wanting to take on a new change and new ways. How far can I go? Will I be able to succeed? How I wish and don't wish I could know the future and prep for it~

HAha!! Lets not go there. Well, gotta get back b4 bi gets back. Oh! Pot plant is gonna be 1 week old soon!! 3 weeks to budding~ Stay tuned~!!

ReiRei

Somehow I feel that this semester is gonna be different. And whether next sem will be like this I do not know. Friends are many, and its not like we r required to choose only one. I do not see how you can see it that way. Neither can I understand that its ok with you guys that you can have other groups but when I do it, you show as if I ditched you.

What the hell is with all the competing and comparing? Seriously! I'm just so pissed off at times that you do not change. Does it please you that someone is having it worse?

Goodness.. Sometimes it really makes you wonder.. Hang out with some people that can make you score awesome grades but suffer emotionally every now and then. Or get average grades but with people that care (I hope they honestly care =P) bout each other?

Ugh.. The pain in my throat is worsening. Pain like crazy.. Life was so fun the past few weeks and months. Don't want it to change just because of some painful things..

.Can I really trust and believe?.

ReiRei

Fuuuuuullllll.... Cooking for oneself can sometimes be hard.. Its like if theres a lil' bit left but you're full and you dun wanna waste it, so you force yourself to eat it. Then you get all uncomfortable.

Actually I dunno if its full or just tired. Haha! Well~ Today is the FIRST day of uni!! Wasnt a very good start I guess but not a bad ending either. Had a small quarrel then lecturer.. FIRST LECTURER of the day/week/month/uni kept saying "erm" more times than I can count. I think that its such a bad habit that I think he says it twice in one sentence! Not to mention being totally monotonous. Ah well..

After that had our first OCF meeting with Arabelle and Pattie~ Haha!! The day sure is gloomy and sad today. Keeps raining like theres no tomorrow! I guess Werribee's Zoo animals will be very happy to have their wells filled to the brim~ So will the rhinos and their muddy wet bath. Haha!!

Looks like things are going I guess the way it should be. Got myself involve a bit too much that I can quite feel the effect now. Feels bit sad but hey! Not the end of the world. Time to get my head focus on what should be done. And enjoy what this year is gonna bring.

BRING IT~

ReiRei

"Hm.. Not sure what I did but neck feels REALLY sore @@"

.A Hint of Doubt or Uncertainty in Your Eyes Makes Me Grow Cold.

Is it ok to date? Should I even try being involve or sharing my space with someone and get the risk of being hurt?

To trust someone other than yourself and family with your life matters. I dunno how people can see it as a small thing but to me its like a huge issue! Sometime it feels like being with someone is like inviting pain in the future. Its awesome if it works out, but disastrous if it doesn't. Friendships broken and sometimes the group that you hang out with becomes different.

I wanna focus on my studies and just enjoy happy singlehood for now. But then again.. Someone told me that its also good to at least try some dating in Uni instead of just hanging out alone at home or just girls.

Full of uncertainty fills my heart. And as I look at the faces, theres always expectancy. Would I change a lot if should get myself involve? Would it be for the better or worst? Would I build stronger ice walls or crumple down? Really don't like this uncertainty *scared* feeling...

ReiRei

Stop Lying To Yourself

Was it expectancy that I indulge myself in it? Was it knowing that following that way it would turn out that way that I chose it? Could it be any less obvious?

Question is.. Is it wat I wanted? Or was it just to prove to myself? All I know now is that perhaps I'm destroying something which is by right nice? Am I that bad to pretend its ok? Aih.. Guilt is creeping to me. And burying deeper makes me feel worst. Few more days then.. What should I do? Continue? Or bury myself in work so that hopefully time can continue its way on how it should be?

Some part of me somehow feels I should choose the last one than the first. Lies does make things sour especially when you started it yourself. Blech =) ...

Rach

So Annoying

My previous place at Micasa sure starting to seem like it wasnt worth it. Isnt it weird how in the present it seems alright and okay but once it has pass and in the future you realized "Ugh.. So worth it to make that choice to move". Well I'm having that dilemma now!

Its so irritating and frustrating. Before moving in, pictures and so on sounded really great. Sadly, upon reaching the room was not only REALLY dirty but cutleries, dustbin and etc was... sry to say, grossed out! You know dirt that are in water for really long becomes black right? And if let in a closed area with bits of air and moist area it gets REALLY smelly? Well, imagine that happened in the dustbin and some cupboard area.

Not enough, dishes and cutleries were stained, some were yellow and man.. Its like the previous tenant didn't even clean!! Carpets were full of fur and I have no idea wat. But learnt in the year there was a cat in the room too. Blech.. Explains wat I tot was sand I found.

My parents and I had to vacuum the whole place, and wash and clean as much as we can. As for cutleries... You could say I cleaned wat was needed for a maximum of 3 people and left the rest in a cupboard. As for cooking things.. My parents decided to buy our own.

Did you know my dad even took the initiative to clean the windows as much as he could?? Ugh.. Anyway, as long it was just to survive I don't feel like filing a complaint. But what annoyed me was them charging me $50++ cause I did not clean everything before I left. My question to myself was, if they r charging me, surely they charged the previous tenant. So WHY WASNT IT CLEAN WHEN I MOVED IN???????????? ROAR!! Dislike dislike dislike!! Worst part is I have no proof that I didnt use the stuff but if some were in my shoes, would you even use things for a YEAR if they grossed you out? And that no matter how much cleaning you did, it was never enough?

Hey guys, I'm not trying to down grade Micasa or anything. And it probably doesnt happen to everyone. And maybe I'm just unfortunate that the room I wanted happened to be like that so yea. Lesson, check the place out first, every crook and corner. And if takes a plane to get there, ask friends to snap REAL photos or all the best I wish you luck. Last thing, ask them if they charge you for cleaning later on. Its really unfair if they were suppose to clean and they charge you for it when it wasnt clean to begin with.

ReiRei

So Fast

3 days passed d without me noticing. And its gonna b the 16th in couple more hours!! Even amazing is that I gotta wake at 6am just to do my timetable!! Garh.. You would nvr see me do such a thing... But after hearing my fren say that she has been doing it always... Guess I shouldnt be surprise. Wan nice seats and nice timetable you gotta put in some effort.

More annoying thing that happened today was that.. I dun even noe how I burn my thumb! How did that happened?????? Ugh.. Still quizzing over it. But it was only while I was washing dishes that I accidently press my thumb and gave me a jolt. Hm... Also I shud hurry and sleep. Will wake up later in 7 hours just to do this.

Thinking pathetic stuff now. Shud slp. G'Nite!

ReiRei

I'm sore all over. Who knew that swimming alone would be even more tiring in just a short while than with a lot of people together.

*yawn* just finish my swim and was kinda nice. No one there except myself. Swam then went into the jacuzzi. Aaah~ Was about to have some shut eye when a guy walked in. Gave me a scare that once he left I went to get my stuff. Strange was that he stood outside the girls changing room. Darn.. So instead went into the sauna to wait out.

Felt kinda nice too being in the sauna while its still new and no one around. Lie there and nearly fell aslp when I realized I lied there for approx 15min (yes I brought my watch with me). Left the sauna and saw no one then quickly headed to the girls room to shower off and back to my room.

Hm.. its not even night yet so I either will nap or do something.. Should start applying lotion, skins all dry *yuck*. Am feeling thirsty too.. Must be due to the salt water. Gtg~

ReiRei

4 Days And Counting

4 more days to availability of creating my timetable for this sem. Who would ever thought I would be this eager to start uni again? Ah~ Then again, when each day after a long period you don't give an Asian something to do, they get restless. And restless would go two ways, doing things which can be stupid, reckless, unimportant, non-beneficial or anything as long as to fill their time. Or just be a lazy-couch-potato.

Which way do I swing? Hm.. Both ways but probably the 2nd one first till I realize I'm getting overweight. Haha!! Wont be a surprise if you eat the way I do and just sleep and watch movie all day.

Well, its still not easy trying to live alone when you've tasted and remembered how great it was to have company all the time. Then again, I don't think I should keep saying that cause its just gonna bring me down. So what I'll try to say is..

Faster graduate with good results and get a job!! Then take leave and do whatever I must. Hahahaha!!! Yes yes!! That would be the plan for now. Being successful can come later~ Just aim to be independent for now. Yep yep~ Hm.. Back to my show Shinkyoku Polyphonica! Hehe!!

ReiRei

Its your usual day. Waking up late, eating brunch (soft boiled eggs and pancakes). Washing up then stoning wondering what to do.

After awhile frens text to chat some things and you're stoning again. After awhile you feel like you wanna go stretch and do some exercise but you're lazy to leave the apartment. Deciding to kill time you watch a season of anime.

Well, thats done and you realize its only 730pm. Wat to do? Time to cook? Hm.. Meat is still frozen. Play SIMS awhile more. Oh dear.. No more energy d. What should I do?

Type here lor. Checking STS although I know there will be no updates or changes till 16th. Lie here in this heat... Oh! Sis found my new fav song.

There we go. Listen to this while going for an early shower then I'll cook. Thats all~

ReiRei Signing Off~

Till Next Time

Its still kinda hard to say goodbye or see you again few months later, after like a year of seeing each other then leaving for university again.

Even watching them depart I didn't feel like letting go or asking them to leave. Its always 2 nights before they leave that I start dreading or hoping I could leave with them or ask them to stay longer. Haha! Aih.. Doing so is quite selfish and not so rite ain't it.

Well, I tried busying myself by cleaning the whole apartment. Took me like 4 hours and then.. it was like just stone.. The noises where my siblings will make : arguments, laughter, anger or annoyance. Growing up can be hard sometimes when you're alone.

Its also strange to do house chores all by yourself when your mom was just around moving all over the place, not sitting still. Dad yelling every now and then for each of us to help him with things or discuss education matters. Aih.. Well, thats family I guess.

Last sem it really took a toll on me and my education when I could not seem to be still and having faith in the Lord that they will be alright. This year.. As much as I love them. And love them so so much~ Haha!! I will ask the Lord to protect and watch over them while I study and faster be independent for myself.

This is the last year of University before I head out into the working world *yikes*. Pray that I'll do well Spiritually, Physically and Emotionally. Haha!! Hopefully no jobs require me to stay for interview in June/July.

Loves
ReiRei

Together-ness Is Variety

How would you count as spending time together? Staying together indoors is that not together? Must it be going out and doing SOMETHING then its something?

Quality time together, sure we are not at home. But I guess this case both sides gave the wrong idea. Wanna stay indoors, lets put away our gadgets if we r feeling lazy bout going out. Same time, don't wanna waste money visiting expensive places by staying indoors, lets do some calculation. We have been going out a lot!

It doesn't hurt anyone's pride to say lets stop being individualist and put away our gadgets and spend time together.

As long as we r bonding, why hurt the atmosphere and let the devil rule by making everyone feel so bitter?

Plus knowing some people who take it the wrong way, they will just fuel the fire and the person whom did not intend for wrong ends up feeling even worse. Ugh... People and Pride... And Who Thinks They Are So Right....

Rei

The Heart Is Always Invincible To Others

Ever get the feeling that people misunderstands your motive? Or at times where people assume they know you so well? Or even better! Someone close to you for SO MANY YEARS should at least have an idea of what you're like but ends up knowing almost nothing? Or maybe they are just oblivious!?

I'm like what? Past my teens and he still don't get it. Thinking what?! Just because I don't earn money so I am selfish? Just because I save means I wont support my siblings if they need it? That I won't share or part some to them if needed?

For goodness gracious! I'm not some irresponsible eldest child like other families that are like that you know. I'm not freaking selfish just cause others are.

I may be naive or at times childish but then again, at times who isnt?! Suspicions of other people is good at times but still! Even your own family you can't trust? Trust! And For Few TimeS! Does it not hurt to think that some of your children DO FREAKING CARE of how the family or the business is like?!!!

Have we been that cold and heartless that even if our siblings drown or suffer that we would leave them to die? Or beg? Geez... Before even thinking or assuming like you always said, at least figure out that your own flesh and blood also cares and ain't as selfish as you think.

Rei

Midst of Travelling

Hello again!! Been travelling up and down Aussie taking photos with sisters and fam. Believe it or not, I thought holidays would most of the time mean waking up late (around noon?) and feeling less tired.

Been waking up almost everyday at 7am or 8am then visiting different places non-stop then sleeping at 1am. It sure is my first time feeling tired at 6pm or 10pm. Not complaining but have to say its fun AND tiring.

Will perhaps post up some pictures of GOR (Great Ocean Road) and Mornington soon. Surprisingly, the apartment in Frankston is much better than GOR~

Goodness.. I'm so tired I dunno what I'm typing. Nite for now~

ReiRei

♥ Supper - Dessert ♥

Our midnight snack~ Yummy!! Banana Split with Red Velvet Cake and topped off with red wine~

ReiRei

Red Velvet Cake

Its CNY!!! Actually past 12am d so probably 2nd day of CNY, but anyhow~ Me and Eunice had our first try at baking our first cake using a microwave oven!! Woah~ How awesome is that!! Turned out success except we forgot to leave the mould on when pouring the icing. Hehe~ But HAPPY Chinese NEW Year Everyone!! Gong Xi Fatt Cai!! Da Ji Da Li!!

Rach

Knife & Tray Hunt

Sometimes online shopping would be soo much better!! Not to mention convenient. Its like you're not sure which shops sells the item you want cheaper therefore... me and Eunice were like walking to 3 different stores about 3 sub-streets apart from each other. Fine.. Two main street apart from each other. But it was still quite a walk.

And funny thing is when you found out that the first shop was cheaper, you don't quite have the energy to go there anymore. Not to mention that shops here close SUPER early so its really not worth making the trip even by public transport.

What annoys me even more was that whenever we found the perfect one, its either the last one or dented or later found out there was another cheaper one. Aaargghh... N because of varities on brands (knives) it got so hard to choose. Trinity? Satin Touch? Then another I forgot.. Aiyooo... Headache ar.. But whats done is done.

As for the pan.. Looks like another day we shall buy. Aih.. Then found out oso that although "Little Penguin" is a brand from Aussie (i think), its like not many people knows it. OR its so far available in only ONE alcohol shop. Sad dun u think?

Well thats that for today. Soo tired.. Had only 4 hour of slp and at church was listening to pastor teach us chinese words coz its CNY eve and then later celebrate his birthday.

Extra:
Just slight xtra news on that. I don't understand why sooo many people has to pray and make the congregation wait for them to say their looong prayer and thanks. If u wanna pray for the pastor then go right ahead and make it short and straight to the point then give others to pray. Aih... If not do it with a group of people and not involve the whole congregation lar.. Then somemore some people were crying.. He isnt leaving or some scary situation!! *face palm* Its just a birthday and u're not even blood related~ Its really very strange... First time first time...

ReiRei

Eunice, My New Housemate for 2012

Yum yum~ Just finish eating our dinner!! Green Thai Curry, self-made ^^. We did sooo much shopping too just to cover for the next 5 days. Goodness.. Never carried soo much things before. But yet after split oso realized was very much worth it.

I never had a housemate before, this will definitely be an experience~ Hearing other peoples views saying how there are quarrels at times or arguments.. I hope we have none or be ok. Not sure what can or cannot do either. Oh well~

At least few things for sure~ She is just as an adventurous eater as I am as long as we don't slaughter or eat tamed/rare animals meat. Haha! Or.. basically thats it~! Can't wait for the real student life to start i guess. I'm so excited to bake and experiment cooking with her.

Sadly didn't get to do this last year as I was living alone. Ah well~ C lar~

ReiRei

With Trials Comes Fruits --- Prov 3:1-12

My son, do not forget my teaching,

but keep my commands in your heart,

for they will prolong your life many years

and bring you prosperity.

Let love and faithfulness never leave you;

bind them around your neck,

write them on the tablet of your heart.

Then you will win favour and a good name

in the sight of God and man.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart

and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways acknowledge him,

and He will make your paths straight.

Do not be wise in your own eyes;

fear the LORD and shun evil.

This will bring health to your body

and nourishment to your bones.

Honor the LORD with your wealth,

with the firstfruits of all your crops;

then your barns will be filled to overflowing,

and your vats will brim over with new wine.

My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline

and do not resent his rebuke,

because the LORD disciplines those he loves,

as a father the son he delights in.

Loads Of Unpacking

After 3 days of lugging, am settling into my new apartment with my new housemate~ So exciting!! We have been walking from our old apartment to the new one just backpacking, trolley-ing and luggag-ing at the same time. Finally today, we have completed 98% thanks to her cousin and his wife.

Not long after that, the horror of looking at our living room being SOOO FULL with hardly any space to walk.. We gradually unpack and organised our things. Phew~ It was like from 630pm all the way up to 230am. Of course we had dinner at 10pm for a short while then continued.

Well, this is my first time really handling my own shifting and it was quite... interesting. Haha! Well, was good exercise~ Now gonna end this and take my shower! Phew~!

ReiRei

Most amusing sentence I received today... "U guys decorate it so cutely!" Haha~ it = apartment

My First Plan/Hope For 2012 Sem1

Its been 3 days or so thinking and asking what can I do this semester. Don't wanna repeat last year where I went all out at the beginning then... *poofed* at the end.

Nono~ Seeking and seeking and maybe not seeking hard enough for what discipleship and evangelism truly mean. And the more I seek, somehow the more answers I get!! Its suppose to narrow down!! Why is it increasing??

Anyhow, what hit me most is for this sem, I wanna see students "Enjoy & Have a Memorable Uni Life". How to do this ler? Why ler?

Probably everyone has their own plans and I myself cannot be for certain how many would join. But I dislike the idea of JUST STUDYING/ASSIGNMENTS in Uni. And since being a uni student, its obviously clear to me how preparing dinner can sometimes be a hassle. Should I book the lounge for a number of people to study there and have dinner/titbits? Then again, where am I gonna get the money? Would it be troublesome as there might not be any internet?

Going through so much trouble, I probably have to discuss with my parents and building manager too. Yikes? But for me.. I cant study in a library.. I dunno how many out there feels the same but you wont see me studying in an area where I can see many stressed out/serious looking faces. Haha!

Well~ This coooould come in as outreach? Really need to seek more on this. Then again, I doubt my parents wan me to bring trouble to myself each time. Hope they dun think I attract trouble coz.. looking back I probably really do bring it upon myself unconsciously. Heh?

ReiRei

Rest Is Also Moving Forward

Although these 2 days I have been sleep deprived (refer to previous post), today after much walking and loving the sun, was lying on the bed listening to music, glancing at the clouds every now and then, and reading Holy Discontent.

Yesss. After many years I continued the book and wasn't exactly reading chapter by chapter but selecting chapters to read. Extraordinarily everytime I pose a question (alone so just questioned out loud), after a few pages it answers me back. Weird..

The answer of course wasn't direct or clear cut but the headings titled the same question I posed without the "what/how/why". Either that, english essay is just structured like that.

Out of the whole few hours, what struck me most was REST. I hear it often,

"rest!!"

To be honest I reflected back that I most of the time push forward and forward till I'm gonna break then only I rest (sometimes after I break). Which I believe tears me down often. Making me feel emotional or depressed.

Same as games, I push and push then when no more energy I try to find places to get energy then continue pushing again. Until really nothing then I stop. Assignments I will do till almost next morning then when finally exhausted, I fall aslp and miss class. Not very gud eh?

Normally I would always think that resting is just to rest. To recover. Not very important as the task before me. Guess I'm wrong~ I will talk to people bout sling shots. To wait and be patient then puuuush forward. From the book, this waiting doesnt necessary means building, but sometimes could mean resting.

Don't over rest and don't under rest. Having just enough is sufficient to let you feel energize and not lazy or fatigued. Think about it~ TRY IT~!

ReiRei

Sleep Deprived

Goodness.. I wanna say that I have no idea what-so-ever of why I am unable to sleep the past 2 nights but I think.. I think, I know why.

Last 2 days been so engrossed in playing risk : faction. Fb game. Lol!! Keep thinking how to win then so frustrating just waiting for soldiers to be made ready so can continue battling. But when time to sleep.. GG... Physically knows its time to sleep. BUT mentally!! Still thinking on the game. Garh!!

When try to stop thinking about games, mind goes wandering to other stuff like what to cook, what to buy, should I schedule my timetable morning or evening classes, what might happen this year.. Etc etc et.. Aiyoyoyo... Tonite MUST try to slp b4 2am!!

Rach

Cleaning and Ice Cream

2 hours of apartment cleaning, about an hour plus of ice cream shopping and other stuff. Waaah~ Feel so happy~!! Nice ending for the day!! Well, can't wait to try making some of those bailey chocolate drink and desserts together with some wine!! Aaaah~ Soon to be, soon to be~


Well, gotta sleep now. Tomoro planning on helping a fren with apartment hunting. Looks like many of my frens will be here studying soon! Gotta help gotta help!! So... TTFN~

ReiRei

What Next?

Iya.. Another drama ended d. Aihz.. Finish watch My Princess and feeling the story really too good to be true ler. Few more weeks or should I say approximately 2 more months before Uni starts again. Am I ready ar?

Oh! This year ar.. I think really gonna hold a lot a lot of new surprises ler. Staying with Eunice, couple of frens coming here to study. Some from uni back at home and some from high school. Aihz.. What does this year have in store for me ler?

Hm.. Family will be coming down to visit me too. Wonder if I will go into short term depression again when they leave.

Then there is cell which I need to decide and OCF too. Aih.. What should I do lar.. Then again.. I don't think theres much I can do. All depends on other peoples opinions too. My position ar.. If they not committed.. I also cant do anything. Really.. I sometimes feel these people ar, dont realize that although its a society, it works up and down! Committee cant do anything if members no enthusiasm. Members oso cant do anything if committee no plans. Then! Both sides request to do something.. BUT dun wanna exert energy. Like that how can.. Aihz.. This kind of things ar.. Since high sch till now I nvr understood. Some people ar.. Wan things done magically. Too bad we dun have magic!

Aih! Finish watch my drama only hear some annoying things. What to watch next ar.. Decide tomoro night lar! Tomoro gonna have cleaning time at my apt! Nite now!!

ReIReI

Now Watching..

I know its not good and no life just watching so many movies and dramas but I dont currently have a job although I dont mind one. And its almost uni days again. So.. Cut me slack for this is my first time watching a lot of dramas and movies~!!

Finished watching KO3 aka San Guo(三国). A Taiwan show, not too bad but oni interesting part for me was when Chen De Xiu was acting and other small funny parts. A lot of love triangles... A LOT~~~

My new next drama I'll be watching is My Princess. Not a bad start so far.. Slowly getting funny when the main guy character starts being a tutor.

Thats all I'll say~ Wanna watch go watch!! Or for frens, can ask me to borrow you no problem~! Cya~!!

Rei

Missing Piece : Unfound

Its already a year being in Aussie. Either its the freedom that is too much or the missing puzzle piece which I keep feeling is real. After church sermon today, it caught me thinking bout my Spiritual health. How is it? How healthy is it?

To be honest..Doesnt feel that well. Kinda explains why been feeling so down? Was all the problems I was going through just an excuse to let myself drown in pity? Hm.. I had tried church hopping/visiting. Realized never tried cell church hopping/visiting. I mean.. Aussie culture is very different. U come or go, not sure if they use the term as "not forcing" as "not accountable".. I understand what they mean but a lot of people, especially uni students/young adults goes to different churches for sermon and a different church for cell. Weird? At first yea.. but kinda understand why.

My basic background understanding would at first reject this idea. I mean, church is your house/home rite? Why r you going everywhr? Cant you stick to one?

Then realized the difference.. Back home, church had adults, uni, teens, kids AND even toddlers section. Here.. Its mostly adults OR teens OR mix. Not saying that its bad but.. Cell for me is really connecting with your church people. I nvr understood the importance of having similar ages to interact cause my church had already been aware of it and instilled it.

Here.. There isnt. I like the fact that every age comes together for sermon. But connecting time.. Its kinda hard to share life generally with age groups that are either much older or much younger. Never realized this till now. But nvr too late to try =). So I'm going to try cell church hopping/visiting for few months. Will update the happenings ^^.

REIREI

Mm.. Still got bad habits of emoticons but at least got two oni. Cutting cutting~!!

An Artist Life

After thinking a bit, and since I keep laughing whenever he does silly things. Really hard to imagine what an artist or famous people's lifestyle is like. Here in shows they look so funny and expression also is made just to amuse us watchers. But their real personality.. Hm.. Really makes me wonder ler. Now watching Xiu trying to get this girl he like in the drama, not necessary he will be like that in reality chasing a girl rite? Aihz.. Drama really is just a drama. And having an actor or artist as a lover ar.. Actually not that easy oso. Hm.. Sometimes think it will be not so bad. Bt after awhile.. Its really just dream dream only.

Plus reading his blog. Seems like everybody sooooo attentive to his worries. But frm the sound of it, he's just living a typical normal guy lifestyle. Own worries and headaches.. Plus.. dunno why lar.. feel his blog sound very sad. Sadder than mine.. Aihz.. Gan ma I go share his worries. Yoh! Dun wan think lar~! Just enjoy the show shud b enuf, not like he knows me or I know him in reality hor. Shower~!!!

Smile lar~ ;)
ReiRei

Sad but Firm

Always growing up without hearing anyone passing away, really makes you think that they will be with you always while you're young. However, tend to forget that as we grow older, people grow older too.

Hearing my friends' situations, losing the people they love.. Although I never reach that far, but I could understand the feeling of not being there when bad things happen. Wanting to do something but am too far away. Wishing there was some way I could protect them from being hurt or doing something in my power.. It really is one of the most painful ever. And since many of us are just international students.. Not sure who we can turn to to talk it out or understand us.

We always look to our parents as being invincible, strong, powerful and almost eternal. Never or rarely thinking they will leave us anytime soon. Alas we are still just humans with limited life length. Lord and Father in Heaven, I know that Your plans are never to harm us or hurt us, but just to make us better. But for this I pray for my brothers that You could somehow lessen their family's and their pain. All the more we should remember to cherish those who are with us now, than leaving each other with a last memory so depressing. When we are weak, please give us strength and hold us close.

ReiRei

梦王子

懒惰谈恋爱了！还是现在趁我那么年轻的时候，去梦一梦喜欢的艺人吧。 Hm。。这些男人啊，是不会爱上但没有错喜欢对不对？哈哈！！一两年前，喜欢的是韩国男生。现在啊。。是台湾人咯~！他弹吉他好棒又好帅！反应也是可爱一下。可能看他表演太多了。。来来介绍~ 他名叫

陈德修 !!!!

可惜他比我大九年。但看还是很年轻。下面就是我新梦王子的照片咯～ 喜欢就慢慢看吧！哈哈！！我先告辞～

ReiRei

Review on Blog Design

Hm.. Not really much of a designer. Although got some ideas.. Dunno how to draw/design it out. Ah well, was too late last night to try. Designing the background was my first time and.. Looks ok but I guess colour looks a bit sad. Hm.. Shuda go for white. Aiya! Shuda saved one as a draft. Now if wan change oso have to start all over again. Next time next time~

While trying to do the header.. No idea how to save just the words as jpg and make background transparent. Is it not possible? Shud b can ar! Ish.. Nid more research and practice. When got mood again then try ba =P!

ReiRei

...Ish! Tried so hard not to put emoticons. Still i go put a stick out tongue above! Change change~ Nearly did it again. Art can actually be an awesome hobby! <3

2012

2012 here d!! Kinda forgotten all about this blog till was reading an artist's blog. Hehe!! Thank God I havent forgotten the email to this blog and the password. Hm.. New year so must have new layout design. N since I quite free... Why not I take my time redecorating this blog again!

Something I gotta learn to cut down is those emoticons. Too addicted d~ Till next time~!!

Rach