Fitting Moments

Lol!! I'm just bad at giving names for things. But anyhow, this is a post bout what happened on Friday at uni. Nothing much special. Went to uni, saw Sally n Charlotte, found out no more sockets (the uni seriously need to fix more as its a UNI!! Thousands of student study there!! With laptops!!) then we were thinking on what to do. Waited for the guys, our seniors (Vince n Wai Hong) came, thank God they had extensions. Then Ah Siang n Geoffrey, who knows how Sally came up with this weird idea of asking me instead of the guys to kindly ask a group of student to shift elsewhere since they not using the sockets. Lol?

Well, anyhow, dunno is it my charm or Geoffrey's stare tht cause them to agree =P. Haha!! So yea, Richard came after, forgetting to buy our lunch. Aihzz.. Then we all just do our work lar. Towards the end, my assignment just didn't make sense. Lol!! Didnt know I suppose to turn off the keyboard echo (ignore if you dun get it =P). Soo... I decided to restart. Oh, n Charlotte, Sally n Richard as well as Geoffrey so kindly went out to buy our lunch =D.

This is where i did things without thinking. Tsk tsk.. Knowing how COLD the room already is. And I was ALREADY wearing a jacket... I STILL went and so silly-ly drank a COLD coke. Silly right? When I went back into the room, a COLD chill hit me. I was like, "Hey, could be bcoz I just step in from the outside.", then realising that with every minute I stayed in the room, I started gettin shivers, which turned to chills, which I couldnt stop shivering. It got so bad, I couldnt talk right without repeating a syllable. And Richard didnt even realise it -.-". Aihzz.. Lol!! N he said I died even I put my head on the table. Swt!! Haha!! Anyhow, Vince kept giving me the stare and asking if I needed an extra jacket. Awkward-ness.. I was like awkward, wanting to get out, yet having those uncontrollable fits-like cases.

So yea, worried tht I wouldnt be able to drive home properly, so I prayed n prayed n prayed. I didnt turn on the air conditioner in the car. First time, welcoming the warmth frm the car for being under the hot sun. Lol!! N just drove home. Got home safe, it was time to go church =P.

So yea!! Been worrying uselessly of my assignment. And yea!! Had to chill the brain, so I type this and now tht I'm better, time to do my CO (Computer Organisation). Haha!!

Loves~

Assignments Assignments Assignments..

Goodness!! Believe it or not, I ACTUALLY stayed in uni till 8pm XD. Oh my!! LOL!! At first I didnt think tht I would but.. yea.. I guess when it comes down to finishin assignments and doing well, you're almost determined to just bout anythin XD. I said ALMOST XD.

Goodness!! You wont believe how amazing I felt to hear some ppl say tht hearing others say "LETS GROUP TOGETHER AND FINISH OUR ASSIGNMENT" could feel the same pressure I feel. Lol!! I dunno bout some of you. Its fun, seriously. But when too many ppl... I just dun feel the same. Its like, if there are those who understands and complete faster than u, u feel discouraged. However if you are understand faster than some ppl, its awkward when they say "Hey!! You finish so fast!! Smart ler..." then they give that sad face and say "Aihzz.. I still dunno how to do.". Lol!!

Then again, not doing in a group... You tend to wonder if the others have completed and you havent. Then you start wondering "Oh my goodness, am I really missing something? Why cant I do this? Didn't I study just as much as they did?". Well oh well..

Anyhow.. Looks like I'll be staying in uni till late again tomoro XD. Then going to uni again on Friday though its a holiday and though its SUPER far frm home. But yea!! Lets just finish these 2 MONSTROUS assignments XD.

After tht.... Lol!! After oni look at finals lar. Hehe~


Loves~ ^^

Enough is Enough

Tired of emo-ing,
Tired of being angry,
Tired of rejection,
Tired of dejection,

Tired of being depressed,
Tired of annoyance,
Tired of discouragements,
Tired of lies,
Tired of saying "4",

Tired of sarcasm,
Tired of hurts,
Tired of frustration,
Tired just means tired,
So enough is enough..

Loves~

Friends

Assignments are piling up / increasing. Finals are approaching. Nerves are breakingout.. Hm.. Having lesser and lesser time to blog. Either tht, come to blog and nthg to type bout.

Aihzz... Is it me.. or...? Having friends from different group that shares different interests.. Is that bad?? In my life, of course you have friends from primary school, secondary school and kindergarten. Everybody has that right? Ok so how bout clubs and society friends. In high school you are already scheduled some part of your time to meet friends with similar interests. How I miss those times.. Its not easy to find that in university. Its like, when everyone free, then oni hav meet ups. Either tht, wait till an event comes lar. Or worst still, their meetings is during ur class hour or its too late, so you cant go.

Doi Adoi!! Not that I'm saying its boring to just have friends from your course but.. Interests?? If they dun get your interests, are you not gonna continue with it?

Hm.. adding on to the group of friends I have, theres table tennis friends. EVERYBODY has different break hours. So how often do I get to meet them? An hr for those that REALLY have opposite timetables as I do. They make time to come and fellowship/bond/play. Sometimes I dun even c them through the week(s). Aihzz.. Dun count the business ppl lar =P, they all super free, of course I will c them slightly more often.

Tambah lagi... Christian Fellowship friends!! My sisters and brothers in Christ XD. I c FEW of them every 30min b4 class starts. Then everyone in CF for 2 hrs A WEEK!!! Bonding?? Hardly!!

Lets keep adding.. Friends which I met from just being in ECA/Student Life Centre. Lol!! I HARDLY SEE THEM.

Now how bout my course friends. I SEE YOU PPL 23hrs a week!! MAX 27hrs a week!! One of you, you know who you are =P.. 33hrs a week!! LOL!! U tell me ler!! Compare tht with my other friends.. You still say I dun spend enough time with you guys? U making it sound as if neglect u all... Sometimes making it sound as if I am "ditching" you all. Say what?? Aihzz... Last time when it was fun n no-problem, thinking of games or ways to keep us all awake is easy. Now... Using them and.. I dunno.. I really just wanna give up. Ignore lar.. I will just keep silent.

I dunno if it really hurts others sometimes, and I dunno it. Or either tht, coolz, they dun show it. Awesome masks they put on everytime. Between us..? I dun feel friendship anymore.. More like, you wan come, then join lar. Dun wan, no diff to us.

Aihz.. either tht... I'm just plain weird =P. A jealous girl, who bothers to get jealous when ppl steals her friends. A emotional girl, who likes to cheer ppl up, yet easily feels dejected. An imperfect girl, who sometimes / most of the time just see that God is probably who she ONLY needs. Not friends, not relationship, not bonds.

If any of you feel insulted or irritated reading this, I apologize but feel free to NOT read coz the blog title says it all... "Thoughts of the Heart". Everything here is sincerely from the heart.

Also to those who still stand by me as friends, best friends or non-blood siblings. Love you and thank you for everything (patience, joy, sharing, guidance, etc)!! ^^ You know who you are!!!


Loves~

So True..

I just realize I have lots of Chinese commentators and interesting guests. LOL!!! But no matter.. Thank you for visiting my blog and giving encouragements, etc ^^.

Tht being said, here's my next post =). This is thanks to "The Believer", whoever he or she may be.. To be honest, university is really tiring enough with assignments, homeworks, exams and revisions. Top it up with socializing (if some of you do, coz I do ^^), playing sports, and what else?? Doing God's work and going for prayer meetings every morning.

I have friends that always wonder what in the world I'm going prayer meetings for. Some even THINKS christian fellowship (CF) will just be more tiring. Well let me tell you from experience.

I feel just the same way you do bout university. But you know what? Somehow every time I "drag" myself to prayer (not a morning person here), I feel better and better with every prayer said. Its like, my body feel thrs something eager to look forward to in university instead of just S-T-U-D-I-E-S. Lol!!

As for CF? Its EVERY TUESDAY, 5PM - 7PM. I know everyone is tired. So am I. But you know what? Besides waiting for the jam to ease before going home... I enjoy myself at prayer. Meaning to say while some ppl are complaining in the car saying "Faster move... Movee...", I am up in CF laughing, joking, meeting new friends, playing and so on. And for those that are looking to wise-n up, CF shares bout what is real. What everybody faces and ways you can overcome. Its real and its the truth.

Anyway, read the lyrics for this song. Listen to it on youtube even better. Its true, the truth and seriously... Listening to this makes me even more energetic ^^.

Link: Nothing is impossible - Planetshakers

Nothings Is Impossible - Planetshakers
Through You I can do anything
I can do all things
'Cause it's You who gives me strength
Nothing is impossible

Through You blind eyes are open
Strongholds are broken
I am living by faith
Nothing is impossible

I'm not gonna live by what I see
I'm not gonna live by what I feel
Deep down I know that You're here with me
And I know that You can do anything

I believe, I believe
I believe, I believe in you

Signing off now =)

Loves~~

Where Is My Path Headed?

Where am I headed to? Past a river? Past a lake? Past a forest or a desert? What kind of trials is it this time? My mind is foggy, I feel like I'm stumbling. Every year I feel like history repeats. Just with different environment and people. What does it mean? Have I not learn my lesson? Am I to change something? Or am I to improve myself than what I am now?

Many times we ask ourselves WWJD (What would Jesus do)? Would God be pleased with our actions? Can I just lack a bit then move again later?

Its really really so hard to always just make that stand and do what Jesus would do. Sometimes it slipped our mind, or we're lazy, or we just feel so much pain, hatred and bitterness that you just wanna let it go and turn wild. Hateful.. Angry.. and Depressed. Lol..

But we know we have to endure it. We know somehow or the other, you just gotta forgive. Somehow or the other, you just have to wash the hurt, cover that scar and move on. Easier said than done.. But if not now? Are we willing to let that evil presence grow in us?

Psalm 69 : 1-20
¹ Save me, O God,
for the waters have come up to my neck.

² I sink in the miry depths,
where there is no foothold.
I have come into the deep waters;
the floods engulf me.

³ I am worn out calling for help;
my throat is parched.
My eyes fail,
looking for my God.

⁴ Those who hate me without reason
outnumber the hairs of my head;
many are my enemies without cause,
those who seek to destroy me.
I am forced to restore
what I did not steal.

⁵ You know my folly, O God;
my guilt is not hidden from you.

⁶ May those who hope in you
not be disgraced because of me,
O Lord, the LORD Almighty;
may those who seek you
not be put to shame because of me,
O God of Israel.

⁷ For I endure scorn for your sake,
and shame covers my face.

⁸ I am a stranger to my brothers,
an alien to my own mother's sons;

⁹ for zeal for your house consumes me,
and the insults of those who insult you fall on me.

¹⁰ When I weep and fast,
I must endure scorn;

¹¹ when I put on sackcloth,
people make sport of me.

¹² Those who sit at the gate mock me,
and I am the song of the drunkards.

¹³ But I pray to you, O LORD,
in the time of your favor;
in your great love, O God,
answer me with your sure salvation.

¹⁴ Rescue me from the mire,
do not let me sink;
deliver me from those who hate me,
from the deep waters.

¹⁵ Do not let the floodwaters engulf me
or the depths swallow me up
or the pit close its mouth over me.

¹⁶ Answer me, O LORD, out of the goodness of your love;
in your great mercy turn to me.

¹⁷ Do not hide your face from your servant;
answer me quickly, for I am in trouble.

¹⁸ Come near and rescue me;
redeem me because of my foes.

¹⁹ You know how I am scorned, disgraced and shamed;
all my enemies are before you.

²⁰ Scorn has broken my heart
and has left me helpless;
I looked for sympathy, but there was none,
for comforters, but I found none.

Loves~