Where Is My Path Headed?

Where am I headed to? Past a river? Past a lake? Past a forest or a desert? What kind of trials is it this time? My mind is foggy, I feel like I'm stumbling. Every year I feel like history repeats. Just with different environment and people. What does it mean? Have I not learn my lesson? Am I to change something? Or am I to improve myself than what I am now?

Many times we ask ourselves WWJD (What would Jesus do)? Would God be pleased with our actions? Can I just lack a bit then move again later?

Its really really so hard to always just make that stand and do what Jesus would do. Sometimes it slipped our mind, or we're lazy, or we just feel so much pain, hatred and bitterness that you just wanna let it go and turn wild. Hateful.. Angry.. and Depressed. Lol..

But we know we have to endure it. We know somehow or the other, you just gotta forgive. Somehow or the other, you just have to wash the hurt, cover that scar and move on. Easier said than done.. But if not now? Are we willing to let that evil presence grow in us?

Psalm 69 : 1-20
¹ Save me, O God,
for the waters have come up to my neck.

² I sink in the miry depths,
where there is no foothold.
I have come into the deep waters;
the floods engulf me.

³ I am worn out calling for help;
my throat is parched.
My eyes fail,
looking for my God.

⁴ Those who hate me without reason
outnumber the hairs of my head;
many are my enemies without cause,
those who seek to destroy me.
I am forced to restore
what I did not steal.

⁵ You know my folly, O God;
my guilt is not hidden from you.

⁶ May those who hope in you
not be disgraced because of me,
O Lord, the LORD Almighty;
may those who seek you
not be put to shame because of me,
O God of Israel.

⁷ For I endure scorn for your sake,
and shame covers my face.

⁸ I am a stranger to my brothers,
an alien to my own mother's sons;

⁹ for zeal for your house consumes me,
and the insults of those who insult you fall on me.

¹⁰ When I weep and fast,
I must endure scorn;

¹¹ when I put on sackcloth,
people make sport of me.

¹² Those who sit at the gate mock me,
and I am the song of the drunkards.

¹³ But I pray to you, O LORD,
in the time of your favor;
in your great love, O God,
answer me with your sure salvation.

¹⁴ Rescue me from the mire,
do not let me sink;
deliver me from those who hate me,
from the deep waters.

¹⁵ Do not let the floodwaters engulf me
or the depths swallow me up
or the pit close its mouth over me.

¹⁶ Answer me, O LORD, out of the goodness of your love;
in your great mercy turn to me.

¹⁷ Do not hide your face from your servant;
answer me quickly, for I am in trouble.

¹⁸ Come near and rescue me;
redeem me because of my foes.

¹⁹ You know how I am scorned, disgraced and shamed;
all my enemies are before you.

²⁰ Scorn has broken my heart
and has left me helpless;
I looked for sympathy, but there was none,
for comforters, but I found none.

Loves~