This freedom a lot people told me bout when u leave the nest, where you dun nid to worry bout finance yet able to roam free anywhr and anytime without eyes following you. Some parts of me wonder if it is really such a big thing. In my eyes, it feels exactly like when i'm at home. Just that when I return, I am greeted with a black silent room instead of a brightened and noise filled house.
I am grateful partly that some part of me understand that it is a maturity process. Or like some part of the bible says, a walk in the desert, a time of solitude/testing. Few things I learnt in these 4 months, endurance, self-less, bonds and probably some other things which cant come to mind now.
Dont feel like rambling a lot now but in all these things, some things which someone once told me blood is really thicker than water. No matter how much I wanted to believe sometimes that is equal, whrby no matter wat, friends will alwyz be friends n not some touch and go (sry for stealing tht ky =P)... It still pains i guess to see everytime someone change and making it look like its for gud, no more anything that existed between us, whether fren or buddies or wateva. And when i c the journey that i have gone thru just slowly fades with some ppl.. haha~ its just sad!! The oni ones that do remain are a handful of buddies/friends and my whole family!! So then why do we sometimes bother stretching wat is already so thin? Why bother create/strengthen new friendships? Hm..
Last thing i do wonder, do evil and negative grow as he/she grows older? Cause the more i wonder about it, the more i'm quite sure XD. Where do negative feelings come frm? Mostly pain and agony and torture no? However to suffer, I'm pretty/quite sure its totally different.
Its just tots~
Rei =)
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