Yay for the END of trials!!!!! Not to mention the holidays tht r finally here. REST!!! So looking forward for this holiday. Whr i am just gonna chill, relax, do somethin to get my mind of the stress n of course do some tuition at least lar har (SPM still not over T.T).. Lol. Tot of going out or mayb hangin out with a friend or two. Watch movies with sisters till super late.
However, just kinda argued with parents. Sad everytime u argue with ur parents. Its even more annoyin when both parties r angry bout diff things. Sigh.. Feels like a ton or MORE of bricks fallin on ur shoulder. I dun EVER wanna argue anymore. Gosh, it just the HUGE gap of generations between us tht is so hard to understand each other sometimes (well, at least frm my point of view i seem to understand but my parents keeps denyin as if i couldnt understand- but i think its just coz they r just super worried n keeps describing how naive n BLUR i am). Its like evrytime when i am about to argue, i will hold my strength back (more of my voice strength) n say what i wanna say. Then i will scolded. Then when i ask a diff q related (still holdin back anger, strength...etc) and i get scolded again. Its so frustrating!!! U know u cant let it out coz u have honour thy father and thy mother. As long as u live under their roof, u hav to obey and not disobey. I actually felt like i wanna cry but then i tot.. knowing my mom, if she sees me cryin she prob scold for being childish or being selfish coz i dun wanna listen to her n go my own way. So dunno lar whether childish onot lar. I took a deep breath and got up frm my bed and stated walkin around my room a few rounds then got out my clothes n told my sis i am gonna shower after her. Now just listenin to music - Survivor(American Mall) , n typin this blog. Feeling silly, stupid, crazy, idiotic, nutty.. Gah.. typing this is prob silly either but who cares. Some of my friends told me before tht i shouldnt bottle too much pain or i would easily break next time. Sigh, sigh, sigh.. Cannot release, cannot hold.. What to do!!!! Just b crazy n listen to music then cool down n b normal?? Lol. I guess thts wat i most of the time do when i get angry except for goin crazy part. Listen to wat music?? Hm.. Can b rock, noisy, calm, emo, love, hillsong, planetshakers, etc.. anything to just listen awhile.
Like nw.. I ok d XD. Strange but i am still gonna post this up XD.
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